Its time!

Im so damn excited. Its been months of planning and almost 2 years worth of talking about. And its finally time. And whats so freaking cute is how excited Jason is too. I love this phase of our lives. The togetherness and the looking to the future. Us talking about future names and the way we will act. The fuzzy future that we have mapped out. A pro-soccer player and an amazing tennis star. A strict upbringing. My folks and his folks lives totally changed as they enter this new world. I know those closest to me are probaby sick of me talking about it but its just so...FUN! I know it may get stressfull and it may get depresssing but I dont care. Right now, right this moment. Im thrilled :) We are doing all this on purpose!

How life changes...

Im in shock. This week has been out of control. I started this week knowing that one of my co-workers was stabbed and his family was murdered about 2 blocks from my house. I then learned that my little cousins boyfriend was killed. The next day my dads best friend died. I go to work the next day and find out another co-workers uncle died and then another co-workers friend commited suicide. Im just so sick of everyone I know being sad. Can we be happy again?? Can we all just go through a day without someone we love passing away?? I just dont know how to handle my loved ones being mourned....I just dont know how to handle the people I love being so sad. I believe in fate and I believe in things happening for a reason. I just hope that the ones I love learn those reasons and learn those lessons in life before the sadness breaks them. I hope that someday soon, the sadness fades and that they realize that the lifestyle they lead is actually the cause of the sadness...Im just sad. I hope someday my loved ones realize that it is the decisions they make that cause the pain and heartache. It is a sad sad day...but it is avoidable...and someday soon...we must celebrate life once again. Its a sad day. And I feel guily for looking forward to my wedding. Knowing that I have the man of my dreams in my arms every night. I am planning a future for him and I and for our unborn children. We have a life together. And maybe, just maybe, our life will be ended early. But I will not take the time that we have already spent for granted...we have lived our lives to the fullest. I am so in love with our life. We are the reason.