Dresses

I went to Alfred Angelo today with my mom Aunt Joyce and Katie. I was in a good mood, but wasnt really 'totally excited' like I thought I would be. I have always thought about dress shopping as this amazing experience, but today was almost a let down. I had fun, dont get me wrong, but the dresses were a let down. The fabric was a let down. I guess I just expected more...so this dress was kinda a mermaid and I did like it, until I tried on the others haha! It was actually pretty hot, even though the material was really light.


This was actually the first dress I tried on, one I picked from online. It was AWEFUL haha, and obviously in pictures it looks like a night gown to me. Oh well. Im narrowing it all down. These arent in order but this is a gown that she brought because it was one of 3 whole halters in the shop. I loved the dress but it was easy to walk away from...it had an organza overlay ontop of the silk, so it had the flow-ey look I was going for.

I really liked this dress, it fit kinda wierd because it was just a bit too big so the clips werent really staying and it kept falling downa bit. It looked alot better in person than it does in this picture!

This dress I think had about a 15 foot train...and Im not a tain fan! I LOVED the bodice, its what made me pick a halter top, but the skirt was just way too much for a boat wedding.

This was the last dress, and it was a favorite for everyone! I liked the fit (it had a higher cut top so it covered my ENTIRE chest, and the boning helped keep everything 'up") the skirt was amazing and I felt great in it. I didnt like the exposed boning but it might be my favorite right now...we shall see what the other shops in Reno brings..

New Changes

Its been a while since I have last posted. We have been busy busy busy with potty training Griffin but he seems to be doing very well. He never really caught on to sleeping all night in his kenel so we decided to let him free and he loves to stay all night in his 'bunker' in the living room.

Griffin also helped Jason out alot when he decided to PROPOSE to me :) He gave the ring box to Griff and he took off like he was in a Nascar race, after pryin the box from his lock-jaw, Jason grabbed my hand, told me what I mean to him and asked me to marry him! I, of course, said YES!!

We were lucky enough to be able to make it over the pass the next day and go celebrate Christmas with his family in Vacaville and tell him folks and his sister about our upcoming wedding. Everyone was thrilled :) Including Grayson, Jasons dog that he hasnt seen in 6 months...The next day we went out and got a kitty! Dexter is a 7 month of kitten and is shockingly good with Griffin, she just bats at Griff like he just an annoyance. They love to cuddle on the couch with us in the evenings. They just make me so happy! (Now that we are getting sleep haha)

I also finished my first semester back at college with 13 credits, 2 A's and 2 B's, much better than when I was 18 haha :) Thats going to be all for now, Ill update more a bit later..

Griffin

We got a puppy :) Im so excited! Jason was thrilled too, I have never seen him so happy as when he was running around with 3 little beagle pups. We have a few days before we bring Griffin home to puppy-proof our home. Im sure it will be an adventure because Jason has never had a dog before (his folks have, but not by himself) So we shall see... Im STOKED to be a momma again.

More pictures to follow Im sure.

Week 1

My first week average weight was 159.1. Not too bad. Im trying to stay confident that if I simply 'stay the course' everything will drop down to where I like it...and I shouldnt have lost 4 lbs the first week, as much as I want to :) So...Im doing ok. Next week starts the yoga again to get some definition back in my arms and legs.

Day 1

Its time to jump back on the 'watching what I eat' horse. I have a small goal of 10lbs by Christmas...shouldnt be TOO hard, but boy do I love my chips and cheese dip :)

Weight: 161

Wine Weekend

It was time. Time to fill my pathetic empty wine rack with some good wine! I think I may have suceeded...

Livermore may not be classically beautiful but I managed to see some amazing things...

They put the grapes in the barrel room in the big containers and just let it all just soak and furment, then later they process it in the barrels...

We got a tour through El SOl winery and they showed us how they processed the wine out of the barrels...looks yummy huh?

I should have bought this sign, because it really just fits me :)

Dad was our DD and enforced all the rules for our trip, see the sign behind him? "No alcohol behind this point!"

It was a much needed vacation and a fun 3 day road trip. I made some macaroni/potato salad, marinated some good chicken and really just enjoyed myself. It was great to see Aunt Maureen and Uncle Greg and Aunt Jeri and Uncle Mike. At dinner one night the owner of El Sol winery came by our table with 2 free bottles of wine for us to enjoy (like we really needed MORE). Everyone we met was amazing and I cant wait to go again next year!

RIP Rosie. My Sunshine

I got a pet door to go out to our patio so Rosie can go in and out and so her litter can stay outside and not in our tiny 1 bedroom apartment...well, the first night and Rosie has taken off :( Im so sad. I miss her like crazy...Please come home Rosie! I keep looking outside thinking that you will jump over the balcony and you dont. I keep looking back onto the couch thinking I will have to yell and tell you to get off. But youre not there. I keep looking at your purple pillow thinking you will be all turned upside down and cute...but youre not there. I love you so much. You make me happy. I always figured that you would be with me...at least for the next 15 years or so. I fought for you...and now you are gone. I seriously miss you...like nothing I have ever missed before. Please come home. Dont test me anymore. I cant handle it.

ETA: SHe was hit by a car and killed today. Way south of town by the Pink Scolaries. I dont know how she got so far, from a cat who was normally too scared to venture past a couple feet from the balcony.

Just call me Aunt Megan!

Im not the one to tell everyone but Im bursting with happiness! Im going to be an Aunt. Not a 'fake Aunt' to Jenns amazing son, or a CousAunt to Chels precious son...but a REAL AUNT :) My brother and sister in law are expecting their first baby. I am on total cloud 9!! Aunt Megan...just has a good ring to it doesnt it??

School Girl

Well, Im registered for college. Holy crap. Im going back to school!! And who knew it was so damn hard?? I started my day with the class schedule and picking all the courses I wanted in the time slot I wanted...no early mornings, no late nights...you know how I roll ;) So where is my luck when not one of those classes is actually open?? So I start getting a little less picky 'ok, maybe Ill start at 0930 and not 1100' that didnt work either! After going through all the class options I managed to get 2 of my classes. One at the butt crack of dawn and one late at night. So, I ask for some opinions, have some wine and decide to go to see an advisor the next morning instead of waiting the 2 weeks for my apointment. My advisor told me a few other options for classes to take and a few ways to get the governement to pay for my CPR course. I rush home and sign on to web-reg and manage to get into 2 more classes. I am signed up for Math 090 (I know, gay right?? I have already taken Calc 176) MGT 212, PSC 101 and IS 101. Im still trying to get into a EMS 100 class and the RAD 090 class. In the spring I plan to take Math 120, NURS 130, and LTE 110 ( I needed some time to get my shot records and cpr certificate figured out). And in the fall of '10 I will plan to take BIO 141, Chem 100, Phys 100 and in the spring of 2011 I finish it all off with BIO 141. That would give me all the requirements to apply for my radiology program and all 13 points that the radiology program requires...cross your fingers for me!!

Im home

After 6 years, 2 states, multiple countries and much anguish I am back in Reno. For good. I got the keys to my brand spanking new apartment on Friday and have been slowly unpacking and settlin in. Jason went back to Vacaville for the week to celebrate Fathers Day and wrap some stuff up and will be making the final drive over the pass this Friday. Maybe Ill save him some closet space ;)

Saying goodbye to Jenn was hard. I feel like I am abandoning her, even though this is now her life and her decision to stay in Cali with the babys father. I keep hoping she will leave his ass and move home to Vegas to be closer to her support system. Im going to miss her like crazy!

I start school in August, have to take a bunch of crap 'prerequisites' before applying to the Radiology program here at TMCC and Im pretty excited about it. Just going to campus made me feel all sorts of out of place though. I felt so damn old! It wll be a whole new world though, going to school at this age, without the drama of 'going out' and college life. I can maybe finish some homework now LOL.

It feels really really wierd to be back in Reno though. I feel bored and kinda uneasy. Im not in limbo anymore and I have direction for my life but I just feel...low. I love my apartment and I love the direction my life seems to be going in. Jason and I are at a whole new level in our relationship and I see us lasting forever. I guess its just nerves maybe, moving in with my boyfreind and giving up any sort of single life. I dont want to be single but having a live in boyfreind just makes it just that much more obvious that I dont have sole control of the TV anymore :) Im sure everything will settle in nicely and Ill get all registered for classes and Jason will find a job and life in Reno will eventually because normal to me once again...

And holy shit, I am in Baby Heaven!! Im so so so excited to have babies in the family! Jenn and Ethan (we find out on Wednesday if her at home sex test was correct) and Chel and Bryce and Keegan...Im so excited to hold your bundles of joy and watch them grow up and explore this world.

I get a sister in law soon too! Heres to her bachlorette party on Saturday!! Im sure its going to be a night to remember :)

Thats about it for now...Ill add pictures of my new place once I get them all onto the computer...

"Its been while.."

Ok. So its actually kinda hard to keep on with this whole internet blog thing when...I dont have internet!! But its ok, Ill catch up, all in due time :) Jenn is 11 weeks pregnant and growing like a weed...

Jason and I had our body fat tested in the hydro-dunk tank thing, and i found out that I am only 2% from 'healthy' but right now am 'good'. Makes me feel great because I have lost almost 25lbs but only just started my weights again, so its nice to know that I kept the muscle throughout the weight loss. Jason and I now have solid numbers of calories to consume daily to get our results. (mine-lose the remaining weight, build strong body, him-bulk up on lean muscles) we got our resting metobolic rates and how many calories our bodies burn during a whole list of 30 minute exercises...its such an amazing to guide to finish off our quest for the perfect bodies!

I start school in July and Im actually excited about it! Sucks that I still have to take out student loans after serving 6 years with the promise of the GiBill paying my way through a degree...but oh well, we have to play the hand we are dealt, no use complaining about it now.

Ill add more later but I just wanted to catch up... :)

Civilian drama

Wow, ok, so I took last week off from responsibility and all that other civilian stuff that one needs to worry about and I just got hit in the face with it today! I have 5 more days in my house, so I guess that means I need to start packing huh? I have to cancel my Comcast, PG&E, switch Jenn and my cell phone accounts into seperate accounts, actually move out of my apartment and into a storage place here in Vacaville. Then I wait until I get my official DD Form 214 so I can turn it into the VA to start my disability checks and so I can file for unemployment so I can make some money while Im lounging around waiting for school to start. I am kinda going nuts. I am going to be homeless for a while. Jason and I are waiting until his 28th birthday on May 17th to see if he is going into active duty. If he gets a job then I will just wait to start school until he gets a permentant base. If he doesnt then he will be moving with me to Hollywood to start my Xray tech program. Im kinda nervous to be moving to such a big area!

All of a sudden I feel like a grown up. Im in a 'big girl' relationship, my brother is getting married, my best friend is due Nov 19th. Its all so...adult. I am completely on my own here, even though I will be living on some couches for the summer. I have my responsibilities but now they seems so unimportant. Its like a lightbulb went off and I figured some things out...like Im not just waiting around anymore for my life to start. Its already here!

I have to get back to packing up my house, and getting it through my head that Im going to be 'Aunt' now :) Im so excited but also so scared at what may come...

6 Month-iversary

Ok, this format sucks. The picture of us in the brown was taken our first date. I guess we still dress alike LOL. I didnt notice until these two photos were up next to one another. The one in black was taken last weekend. Im amazed to have lasted 6 whole months with you, Jason. We are pretty much the same person. Stuborn, oppinionated, bull headed, moody. And somehow we compliment each other. We have the same sense of humor and can sit in a car for 9 hours and NOT get annoyed with each other. We laugh at the same things, we plan to raise kids the same way. We both get annoyed at stupid drivers (or people in general). We have our differences, and we deffinitally have our 'days' but we sit and talk about it and we get through it. We fit. Its just that simple. Im head over heels in love with you Jason. You taught me what love really was. Until recently I figured it was unattainable, to find someone else to 'put up' with me. But love is actually about trust and communication. I have let go of all my 'expectations' and have simply put my trust in you. No matter what, even if things dont work out, I am happy to feel this way, today. And thats enough. I dont need to prove to anyone else what our relationship is, its simply 'us'. I have my moments of jealousy, but in the end I trust you. I am content to be in your arms. Im content to spend this time of my life with you. And hopefully we will have tons more time together. Love, Megan.

Gotta love it

I wonder when some folks will realize that I dont live all that far away, and maybe I woud like to be included in some familty gatherings. But no biggy, I know the folks in my life that want me to be around. Like Rosie and Fig :)

The last 17 days.

I have 17 more days in the Air Force. Im kinda scared! But Im more pissed. It seems that if I was going to have any regrets about getting out vs staying in, my leadership has squashed it! I have been the shop bitch for far far too long. My schedule has been fucked with, my days off taken away and I have a whole 3 days off to 'outprocess' when most everyone else gets 10. I now get to work 12 hour shifts for the next 12 days. Oh yea, and its grave shift. So from 6pm to 6am, I get to try to sleep during the day under the elephants that live upstairs. Jesus. I guess I can go through anything during these last 17 days but come on! Do we really need to test my limits?? Im about to go ape shit on my leadership...17 more days, 17 more days, 17 more days.

Then what? Oh yea...then Im a CIVILIAN!! Im gonna pierce my nose and do whatever the fuck I want. Im stoked to be back in Reno for a while and Im stoked to spend with my mom and dad and maybe even see my brother and soon to be sister in law at times ;)

Ok, just had to vent. I hate my job. In case you all didnt already know that...

Day Dates

Yesterday Jason and I decided to go out somewhere and do something that we normally dont do. I suggested walking across the Golden Gate bridge and he agreed so off we went! It was awesome. It was kinda overcast so we were a bit nervous that if wouldnt last but it was a great day. On the way up there Jason mentioned some old World War 2 batterys up in the area so we decided to bypass the toll fee on the GG bridge and went out hunting for adventure. It was amazing. On the furthest point to the ocean there are these old barracks and watch posts, and lighthouse all to keep the eye out on the Pacific for any enemys. This place is amazing! Sucks that some folks like to grafitti but it was pretty intense just walking around this place. On the way home we got kinda lost and decided to walk around the downtown marina area of Sausalito...crazy rich area!! We bought a bag of salt water taffy and held hands and it was so freaking cool. On the way home we stopped for some movies and a bottle of wine and had Jenn and Eric over to watch Annapolis. I made some fabulous chicken with jalepenos and after Jenn and Eric left, Jason and I watched the first Nightmare on Elm St. (we bought the first 4 in the series for a whole 13 bucks) It was a perfect Saturday. Just had to share.

Weekends are fun :)

I had a great weekend. I was pure bliss! I had Friday off so I cleaned and did lots of stuff (see below post) and then went out to the bar on Friday night (wearing a pair of jeans I havent been able to fit into in about 4 years) and Jason stayed over, he has been sick lately so he has been going back to his own bed (and toilet). The morning was amazing, laying in bed giggling with him and just kinda teasing and having fun is just...amazing :) After he left for the gym I went over to Jenns for our Saturday morning ritual of drinking lots of coffee with some Lifetime. It wouldnt have been Valentines day with my single best freind if we didnt start drinking wine pretty early :) We talked and caught up and made plans and it was perfect. I love my best freind!! Then I had to go home to get ready for dinner with Jason at Cattlemans...YUM. I even put on heels and a dress. We show up at 6 and the wait was 2 hours! No problem for us, we snag a drink (they had a lovers special, a Cosmo with champagne!) and sit and wait. We LOVE to people watch and this waiting room was pretty funny to watch! Jason getting GAWKED at by the blonde with the short boyfreind, the fat lady with my moms haircut chowing down her fried onion rings and HUGE steak, the couple with the fanny pack who laid claim to the couch, the itty bitty hostess with the HUGE voice calling out names. It was fun. We just spent the time together. We finally get seated and had a fabulous dinner, with dessert and all. The salad dressing was pure bliss, the steak was out of this world and the dessert made Jasons eyes roll to the back of his head. After dinner we stopped by the local 'adults only' store and met some really interesting people with some very wierd fetishes (pregnant submission, shemales) it was entertaining :) So then what do we do? We go home, change into jammies and watch Saw 5. What else do couples do on Valentines Day? LOL. We were both stuffed rotten from dinner so we just went to bed.

Sunday was fun too, woke up late. Went to the gym where I get the gossip from Jenn and listen to Jason on the treadmill behind me huffing and puffing through his 5 miles. Enjoy a couple cups of coffee and head to Target. I was supposed to get everything I needed there, but I didnt. All I could find was the damn iPOD usb cable I needed, so I bought When Harry Met Sally and a bag of chips and dip and said 'screw the Slimfast I needed, Ill get it tomorrow.' Made it to Petco to get the little Purr Pads for my cats (those things are like MAGNETS!) Went home, watched my new movie with my bag of chips and relaxed until Jason showed up. He shows up a couple hours later and we put some CDs onto my ipod with my new cable. We make it to the movies and watch The International (btw, we were by FAR the youngest people in this theatre, its like it was the old fogies showing) good movie...on the way home we stopped and got some stuff to make peanut butter cookies (all natural pb, splenda instead of sugar) and I found some gluton free pizza! Go me! At home we mix up the cookies and start our newest Netflix show, Dexter.

It was a great weekend. Im sure I could have made that shorter haha, but hey, its my blog damnit :)

Motivation much??

Man, I feel like a new woman today! I had to wake up early (haha, yea 8am) and go to a girly appointment (who DOESNT like getting manhandled in the morning?). After my doc visit I made it to the gym for my 45 minutes of my ass hurting on the sitting bike. I drove to base to 'sign in' for PT for work and went grocery shopping. Now, at the store I really only needed a few things, like chicken, diet coke, coffee, and pickles...so what happens? Yea, I spend $178 bucks...but at least I remembered to get some quarters for laundry. But I forgot my slimfast shakes, damnit.

Oh well. I come home, unload my groceries and put them all away (finally looks like a grown up lives here instead of a college teen) As Im getting my clothes ready for laundy I realize all the other 'shit' I have around my place. So I start to throw it all away. Those Beanie Babys that are like 15 years old (dont worry, they were only going for about 7 bucks on ebay, I checked) anyways, I threw them away. Those old crappy picture frames that I got in a set of 400 for 20 bucks? Gone. Those dangly things randomly placed throughout my apartment? Gone. Those wierdly tall glasses for margaritas that I had filled with bottle caps? Gone. All the papers and keepsakes that I will never really know why I kept? Gone.

So now, my laundry is almost done, my house is CLEAN and Im ready for a nap! I love days off :)

I lost my cat!

LOL, not like that...Rosie's fat ass was on my scale the other morning and I saw that she weighs a nice round 10lbs. Today before my walk I weighed myself and saw that I have lost 10lbs since January! Go me! So now when I pick up Rosie I get to actually feel how much weight I have shed. Its amazing.

SERIOUSLY??

How hard is it to simply follow the rules?? Crosswalks are for pedestrians, blinkers are so other cars know that you are turning, assigned parking spaces are for the person ASSIGNED to that space, no parking zones mean NO PARKING. Is it really all that hard? I didnt think so but almost everyday I come home to someone either IN my parking space or in the 'No Parking' zone blocking my space. I mean really...how much time are you saving? Do you have no concept that other people actually excist here on planet earth?? Drive between the lines, yield the right of way, pull over when ambulances come up behind you, GO on green, leave your kids at a sitters if your going to an adult move, dont talk during the movie, turn your cell phone on silent in the gym, movie, resteraunt, take your screaming children outside...its not really that hard is it??

Confusion

How do some people lives turn out so...wrong? How is it that in my little apartment complex there are so many ways of life! I hear my upstairs neighbors yelling all the time. There are 4 of them in that one bedroom. They drive a sooped up SUV and have a big flatscreen TV but their kids sleep on bunk beds in the only bedroom. The family yells and fights all the time. The neighbors next to me are 21 and have a 2 year old. The husband is outside smoking and on his phone all the time and I hardly ever see the wife. They are never together and never seem to be enjoying each other. Driving home today I had to pause for a bunch of gang banger to get out of the driveway because they were too busy yelling across the street to some other teenagers (there were about 8 cops out there too, Im nosy as hell and want to know WHATS GOING ON??) Where do these lives get so...mixed up? There is no way that these kids are happy with where they are in life? Do they even know that there is a whole other world out there? Are they even WANTING to know? Im not saying my life is perfect but I grew up with morals and rules. If the sign says 'No Parking' then I simply dont park there. If My buddy is passed out in the bushes then Im going to wake his drunk ass up and make sure he isnt sufficating himself with his own vomit.

Where do we go 'right' and where do we go 'wrong' growing up? How do I realize that some people just dont care that they never leave Vacaville? How do I realize that some people are simply going to drink their lives away because their wife died? How do I stop caring? What am I supposed to do...just sit back and live my cushy life (that I formed all by myself!) and dont worry about them and how they are throwing away the only life they will get? Im just so angry that some people will just sit back and allow these things to own thier lives.

You have a shitty job? QUIT!
You have bad parents that dont love you? MOVE OUT AND LIVE YOUR OWN LIFE
Your wife died 3 years ago and you are now an alcoholic? GROW UP! You are still alive!
You are 22 and think you know everything? DONT EVER COME BACK TO MY BAR, THERE IS NO HOPE ;) ( just kidding...kinda...I dont like you Jamie lol)

There is just so much out there that I think this town is slowing killing me. Everyone here is just kinda complacent. They are simply too lazy or too naive to think that life gets better. Life is out there, they just have to get off their asses, quit doing drugs, stop drinking your life away and GO FIND IT!!

Wow, ok...rant over :) Time for work, the job I hate that I sucked up and finished my 6 years of anyways...

Mornings

SO I was switched from working a normal job to 'swing' shift. At first I thought it was going to be almost as bad as finding out that beautiful dress you waited 6 months to find only comes in size 'small' but now that I am a few weeks into my new shift I am in LOVE!! I wake up about 10am, sit here at the computer with my girls Rosie and Fig and drink a couple cups of coffee, then I head to the gym to see Jenn and Jason and do my cardio. After the gym Ill sometimes enjoy another cup of coffee at the club still then Ill come home, make some lunch and pack my 'dinner' for work. Work is slow with no real bosses around so its quite nice and then I get off at 10! I can go out and stay out late or read a book until 0130. Its pure BLISS :)

So here, just cuz Im an attention whore for my favorite girls ever...(and if anyone can tell me how to get the pictures on the BOTTOM of the page that would be great)

New Years Resolutions??

Its February now...who is still actually following through with thier resolutions?? No one? Just me?

I had a whole list of trivial shit I wanted to 'do' this year. From actually giving up beer (gluton) to not drinking during the week to not putting up with bullshit from guys to finding Jack a new home and finally to get HEALTHY! Well, I think Im making some serious progress! I have not had gluton (beer, any small 'cheats' that I have been having) Since January. I found Jack an amazing new home and my carpet (and nerves!!) thank me. I cut back on alcohol, only once a week (soon to be never, but come on, thats a hard one to just DROP!) and I have lost 7 pounds!

I went out to eat really only 2 times in January. I am doing slimfast shakes and bringing veggies and snacks with me to work. I hit the gym 5-6 days a week to hit my sitting bike (I can thank my low back for not allowing me to do much of anything else) and I am getting FIT!

All these other times I would lose weight (hello Iraq! and 30lbs) I would just go right back to my old habits...pry why I gained the weight anyways right?? Duh! So Im thinking that this 'change' is amazing...I feel good. I dont crave Jack in the Box and after reading that my mexican pizzas have 35 grams of fat (almost 60% your daily requirement) I dont crave Taco Bell either! Most places have burgers and food but they are so high in fat that its INSANE! An ultimate cheeseburger from Jack/Crack have 1010 calories!! And 65 grams of fat! What the fuck?? An orea shake from Baskin Robins? 1400!!! Its nuts! No wonder America is FAT. Its all that is out there. They are all about showing off superhuman models and then the only options to eat really are hugely obese foods that dont really seem like they would be so bad for you! Its just a burger and a shake! No biggy! Except that burger and shake are your entire days calories and 2 days worth of fat! Yummy ;)

SO Im pretty happy. I should get down to my goal weight (155lbs, my weight after Iraq) in about 6 weeks. And after that Ill see how far my body wants to go. I was about 130-135 all throughout high school so maybe Ill aim for that number ;) Who knows? Ill let my body decide where its happy and healthy...

My next resolution is to pierce my nose...huh, only 5 more weeks and I can! Heres to St Patricks Day! My 'release day'!!

The new me

So, I have about 6 more weeks here in the military. And Im pretty much scared shitless!! I have had 2 full breakdowns so far. And I dont mean little 'oh no! what was I thinking??' breakdowns, but full, sobbing on the bathroom floor breakdowns.

I hate change. No wait, I HATE change. I love my nice, stable, cushy life. I love my one bedroom apartment. I love being able to buy the good coffee instead of the jug O' Folgers. I love knowing all the roads and seeing people I know while in town. But I HATE the unknown. I hate not knowing if Jason is getting stationed overseas. I hate not knowing if I can even save enough money to move to whereever he gets stationed. I hate not knowing how long I can actually put up with Reno.

My plan so far-- Move home to mommy and daddys spare bedroom. Mom is STOKED! Collect unemployment. Hey, I deserve it! I busted my ass in a life I hated for 6 years! Now I get to relax and breathe for a while. Ill be in Reno while Jason is in Basic and Tech school so it wont be too bad. I get to be home for my brothers wedding and my cousins baby! Im pretty excited to catch up on these events after all the other ones I missed while I was away :( Anyways- Jason will get stationed somewhere fabulous! We are hoping Seattle, Denver or anywhere in Florida. And I will apply for my X Ray Tech program and move to school. Jason will be living in the ghetto fabulous dorms and we will be just fine. Or not, but either way, Ill be going to school and Ill figure the rest out later LOL.

So, what do you think? 6 month break, move to somewhere to go to the program I really want to get into...NICE!

Breakups suck!!

Ok, Im done with my nap so I can write out what I really wanted to 'blog' about :)

It was all perfect about October. I was in new-relationship bliss with Jason and Jenn was really hitting it off with Jeremy. We would all hang out and it was IDEAL!!. So fast forward until Xmas time, Jeremy has been gone on a 40 day 'deployment'. When he came home he basically shafted Jenn and pushed her out of his life but still wanted to be 'freinds' even though he isnt even really good at that. But here we are now. Jason is freinds with Jeremy and Im freinds with Jenn. So how do we all still hang out?? Well, we dont. The bar has become kinda tense and cranky and we are constintely trying to console our freinds. But when does that end?? Breakups dont just affect the 2 people in the relationship! Jenn said she didnt approve of me hanging at Jeremys so if Jason goes over there I have been respectively declining. But now damnit I want to hang out with my boyfreind! So I put my foot down and told her that I was not going there for Jeremy but for Jason and I was not dis-respecting her in any way!!

So now its Superbowl Sunday. We are going to hang out at Jeremys for the game. And I managed to talk Jenn in to coming along! (she was slightly angry, saying she 'didnt have a choice' but still, maybe we can all be civil and end this craptastic 'breakup rut'!!)

Why do things have to be so difficult?? I dont want to go back to the way we were but its hard not to when we were so happy...

My apartment seems too quiet...

From my seat at the table I can see my entire apartment. I can see the kitchen with with pans still in the sink from lunch, I can see my living room with my cats Rosie and Fig on the couch. I can see my bedroom door (which is closed due to keeping the cats out now), the only thing missing is Jack. And Im ok with that. I had to make a decision. And I did what was best for him. Instead of being cooped up in my little 600sf slice of heaven all day he is now going to be living with his actual mom and dad on a huge ranch. He will be free to run around with lots of other Aussi's and have his people home all day. He gets to shoe horses with his new dad and go on walks with all his relatives. Its so amazing that I was able to give him back to the breeder that I bought him from. He will live out the rest of his life in pure puppy bliss!! ( and I dont have to pick up anymroe dog shit!)

Heres to you Jack!!